still standing?

okay so lately, due to the fact that i have been pulled into this weird limbo state of me being sad, depressed, but seriously feeling no emotion...weird? yes...true? absolutely...i have undergone a weird addiction for Lifetime...you kno, that channel that old ppl watch a lot...and like i have been watching still standing a lot and will and grace a lot too, both stellar shows, and i mean i was watching still standing like 10 minz ago and totally noticed that my weird and complicated love life is exactly like Linda's (Judie's younger sister) and i was all sitting ther on the couch with my baggie of popcorn thinking to myself, dang, i am not alone, and yesss i realized that ppl totally have it worse then me, 4 example: those girls you hear abt who get left at the altar :(( sad stuff man, and that like totally tops my sitch bc seriously if the whole being left at the altar thing happened to me....i wuld like die...idk wut i wuld do...i think i would b able to function in a normal atmosphere anymore :( bc think abt it, if i am all like bleeehhhhhhh now over like being dumped throo email..think of how i'd react to being dumped on my wedding day...ouchie...i dont even wanna think abt to b honest :(( but now idk wut i wanna do with myself honestly bc i'm usually so self absorbed in trying to achieve LEVEL:PERFECT GF i've nvr rele known what to do without the goal bc (this is way b4 i was ever in a good-ish relationship) if i wasnt in a relationship and i was totally single, i'd take a trip to the mall and find myself a new man, of which the mall has a great selection :) but hmph as soon as u make plans with them and they r all like my gawd ur so hot, u find out they have a freakn gf...they nvr told u abt...thus leads me to my point abt the whole i've been played too many times to count thingggg....but dang i jus noticed...of how much i rant abt "him"...and how much i'm all like blah blah blah blah over reacting and stuff...i find myself rele rele rele rele rele rele hating being single...gah i now mark this moment pathetic loser moment number 2!